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3 Steps to Help Your Child Start School with Confidence

Do you have a daughter, niece, or granddaughter? Then the start of the new school year can be hard.

Let’s talk about how this change may affect her. She may be feeling a bit sad, anxious, or plain scared. I want to give you 3 steps to ease her anxiety and help her start on the right foot.

Step 1: Acknowledge feelings

I recommend you spend some time talking about your own feelings and experiences. You may remember how it was when you started school. Share the feelings you had as a child. Tell her things like: yes, I felt uneasy and anxious when I started school too. It’s always like that when you start something new.

Talking about these feelings and showing her that it’s normal to have such feelings can help your daughter alleviate any fears she may have. If she has older siblings, get everybody together to talk in a happy way about school, perhaps sharing happy memories from previous school years.

And also ask your daughter to share her feelings with you. Doing so will help her feel safe, heard, and understood.

Step 2: Morning routine

This step is more practical, but nonetheless important. It’s about having a consistent morning routine so that your daughter won’t feel rushed.

The reality is that both adults and children thrive from routine. When we know what to expect, our sense of security grows.

Prepare the best you can the night before: for example set the clothing to reduce added stress in the morning. It also helps for you to talk about how the morning will go when you say good night so she goes to bed calm and assured.

Step 3: Your influence on her

Finally, watch yourself. Be calm and grounded. Stay positive and happy. At all times, imagine the best school experience and trust that your daughter will adjust well. Children pick up on what happens around them, so our positive attitude can help them relax.

In truth, you cannot predict 100% how your daughter will react to the back to school experience. She may adjust relatively quickly or she may take several days and weeks, sometimes much longer than you expected.

More often than not, children are more resilient that we think and are able to adjust to change and enjoy school sooner or later. Remember to stay positive and upbeat and you will gain more than by worrying.


So let’s recap the 3 steps discussed:

Step 1. Talk about feelings and help her understand that other children go through the same experience.

Step 2. Have a consistent morning routine and allow plenty of time so you are not rushed and less patient.

Step 3. Watch yourself, how you react and how your own attitude (positive or negative) can influence your daughter.

Don’t hesitate to ask for help if you are overwhelmed. Friends and relatives, and also a life coach for children can help!

In my own practice, I work with young girls to help her feel more confident. I use the WISDOM System for Coaching Children from Adventures in Wisdom, which is based on stories, focused discussion, and fun activities and crafts.

If you’d like my help as a coach to work with you and your daughter, let’s have a chat! Contact me today to get started.

Make it a wonderful day!

~ Delia.

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1 Comment

  • Tiziana Knox / 4 September 2018 7:49

    Thank you for this Delia! Girls can be very anxious going back to school and your tips are fantastic!

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