How to be Patient
How to be Patient Even When You Want Things Like Right Now | Written By: Nikki Novo
I constantly find myself confined by my lack of clarity. As you can imagine, I overanalyze every move, in search of the straightest line to my desired outcome.
Of course, after enough meditation, prayer, and journaling, I’ll find the best route for me.
That’s what we strive for, right? A clear, safe, and quick route to our desires. So once we find that route, we should rejoice. And we typically do. But the excitement that comes from finding our way only lasts temporarily before it gets clouded by our impatience.
It goes something like this: I’m confused. What do I do? Ok, I found my way. I’m going to do this. I’m doing this. Shit, why am I not there yet. Move faster, damn it. And now, I’m confused again.
Ohmygosh, tell me this isn’t you. I see this happen all the time, in my clients and in my own life. After all this soul searching, we finally find our way. We take one step towards our way and then we’re upset that we don’t get there over night.
Logically, we know this is silly. Great stuff does not happen in a month of effort. Businesses take years to grow. Careers take months to form. Relationships take time to nurture. I mean just look at the pregnancy process: it takes 10 months to create a fully formed baby.
If we’re not aware of the role impatience plays, we can quickly fall into self-doubt and begin to second-guess the intuition we decided to follow. Second-guessing brings us on a detour and then we start the process all over again. Detour – Lost -Need Clarity – Found Clarity – Back on Path – Why isn’t Shit Happening?- Doubt – Detour Again.
Detouring over an over is not the answer. Patience is. Having compassion for the process and yourself is like good music on a boring road trip. It’s a necessity.
Compassion can be a complex virtue. For this reason, I’ve jotted down a few actionable steps to help us all cultivate compassion while on our intuitive journey towards our desires. Think of these tips as the road-trip games your parents would make you play in order to keep you sane.
1. BE EASY ON YOURSELF
Impatience is an easy excuse for us to be an asshole to ourselves. We’ll push ourselves to work faster and harder. We’ll blame our lack of speed on something we’re doing. It’s really sad, but it’s a reality. Catch yourself when you’re doing this and remind yourself, “Great things take time.” It is not something you’re doing wrong.
2. KEEP OF RECORD OF YOUR PROGRESS
Many times we don’t notice progress, because we’re not keeping count. When you’re walking that path, there is progress. Some tangible and some not, but it’s happening. The key is to write down every day the big and little progress you are experiencing, so you can prove to yourself that you are, in fact, moving.
3. HAVE FAITH
Faith is another one to grasp, because it feels like magic. But more than anything, faith is like going to the gym for your brain. In order to walk this journey, you need a strong mind. Faith builds strong minds. When the mind gets tired and starts doubting, faith is the coach as says, “Hey, hey you can do this. You’re doing a great job.”
4. ENJOY WHAT YOU HAVE IN THE MOMENT
Living in a place where our better days are in the future sucks. Maybe this current moment isn’t the ideal, but it’s something. There’s something to be grateful for and there’s something we can enjoy. Taking time to get off the grind and enjoy LIFE is totally okay and mandatory. It will not make our journey slower, in fact it will speed things up by avoiding burn out.
5. TRUST IN DIVINE TIMING
Lastly, my friend, there is such a thing as divine timing. There’s this huge universe that is constantly moving puzzle pieces around. There is an order of things, and sometimes we just have to wait our turn. Things don’t happen as fast as we’d like to for a reason. God is keeping us safe. It knows what it’s doing. Our job is to trust and enjoy the ride.
Nikki Novo is a Cuban-American author, motivational speaker, life coach, medium, and energy healer.
A certified hypnotherapist with the International Association of Counselors and Therapists, ThetaHealer(r) and Reiki healer, Nikki is the author of “Will I be Alone Forever? …And Other Dating Questions You Wish a Psychic Would Answer.” She has taught at The Standard Spa, Miami Beach and Soho Beach House. She has also been commissioned to speak by organizations like Levo League, Fordham University, Florida International University, Macy’s, Saks Fifth Avenue, Baptist Health, Femfessionals, and Latinas Bloggers Connect.
Previous to becoming an activist for authentic living, Nikki was the Miami editor for Refinery29, an editor for DailyCandy, and the associate editor at Miami magazine. Her work has been seen in Allure magazine, Town & Country, the Huffington Post, DailyWorth, MSN.com, Zagat.com, and others. She also spent time in the publicity department of Lionsgate and Fox Searchlight in Los Angeles.
As an expert in purposeful living, Nikki has been featured in Marie Claire, NBC, MSN.com, Telemundo, Babble.com, Arizona Latinos, Miami New Times, and Aventura Magazine. She also held relationship columns with eHarmony.com, the Huffington Post, Miami New Times, and Disney.com.
Nikki is a work-at-home entrepreneur and mom. She is a tribe member of her family consisting of her husband, tween-in-training daughter, toddler boy, and three-pound Yorkie – who is also her desk mate. http://www.nikkinovo.com