If a decision seems hard… here’s how you tackle it!
A couple of months ago, while I was on my way to a wedding in Tennessee, I was deciding whether I should make the time and money investment to go to a business conference in California. With my business being in diapers, and trying to grow consistently, I could’ve argued either side of that dilemma.
“Should I go and leave my business for three days? What if everything flops?”
“Should I deprive myself of the potential of this event out of fear? What kind of coach would I be?”
For some reason, this decision felt important. Why? Because I was resisting making it, I wasn’t resisting going to the conference; I was resisting having to decide whether I would go or not.
When I acknowledge the resistance, I allowed myself to get curious about the roots of it, so I asked myself some fundamental questions.
1. “Am I clear in what I want?” This is the question you need to ask yourself until the answer is a loud and resounding YES. Why is it so important? Because a confused mind does nothing! We don’t get to move to the second question until we know what we want. In my case, I knew what I wanted, “Help women struggling with self-doubt and perfectionism through coaching, and growing a sustainable business that would allow me the freedom to do so, from anywhere in the world.” This was easy for me because I have been working on my WHY for a long time, if you need some help with your clarity, HERE’S a little gift for you.
2. “What’s keeping me from what I want?” Now, this question requires brutal honesty, and most importantly, it needs you to find the answer within yourself. No outside things should be the answer to this question. In my case, what was keeping me from making the conference decision with regards to the growth of my business and the culmination of my vision, was my fear of making the wrong decision. So I did what any recovering perfectionist does… I opted for not deciding at all. Lame, right?
3. “What do I need to do differently?” Answering this question requires creativity, now that you have acknowledged what’s keeping you from taking an important step, it is time to DO IT ANYWAYS. When you are resisting something, it’s usually because it is crucial, it tugs at every fiber of your body, and we know how little the body agrees with change and getting out of its comfort zone. I wanted to feel confident I was making the right decision, but I forgot that confidence is built by courage, choosing bravery over the fear of failure. Failure’s a great teacher that we should always embrace. In my case, I knew that it could take me forever to decide if I let myself use logic, so instead, I decided to leave it in the hands of my higher power, I said on that plane that morning… “Universe, if I should go to this conference, show me my sign.” Sounds crazy? Well, not as much as what happens next.
For anyone who follows me on social media, you know you that I am obsessed with red foxes, that is, of course, my sign. When I decided to let myself make a decision based on the guidance received from the universe, guess what happened? 10 minutes after my husband and I landed in Tennessee, we were on our way to pick up our rental, and a block away, there it was… A store called “The snooty fox” with a red fox wearing a tux and a top hat on the sign.
Well, damn it! I got my sign and my mind was made, I picked up my phone, bought all the tickets, booked the hotel and started a journey that has so far resulted in a new clientele base, over $7,000 in sales in three weeks, and a new found confidence in DOING THE HARD THINGS.
It’s your turn to ask yourself those questions.